We are finally at the stage in our journey where we are reviewing the contract between us and the surrogate. The surrogate contract is a dense, complicated, beast of a legal document.  You have to make challenging decisions about who will care for your unborn child if something happens to you and your partner, understand the impossible medical insurance landscape in the U.S, and navigate the evolving medical landscape of what pregnant women can/can’t/shouldn’t do. In this article, I share personal reflections and guidance on the surrogate contract for other gay intended dads on their journey in the U.S.

A recent study used real world data from Ontario, Canada, to compare mental health diagnoses during and after pregnancy between unassisted deliveries, IVF, and gestational carriers. This is a great topic, and more data is needed to really understand if there are unique mental health challenges for surrogates.  Unfortunately, I have several issues with the publication that I will discuss in this article.

What is the experience like for a surrogate or gestational carrier (GC) in different countries? A new publication examines this question, looking at the psychological aspects and studies that have been conducted in the UK, Canada, USA, and India regarding surrogate experiences. I have reviewed this article, and I have added my perspective as an international gay intended dad, physician, and researcher.

A truth known to parents through adoption is closer to being realized by parents through assisted reproduction:  Genetic contribution does not make a parent. A recent scientific breakthrough was covered widely by the media where three adults contributed genetics to a single child:  Cellular DNA from the sperm of one parent, cellular DNA from the egg of another parent, and mitochondrial DNA from a donor egg. Read more to review the science and implications for gay intended and current parents through IVF and surrogacy.

We think we found ‘the one,’ as in the surrogate who will help us to finally become parents. We don’t want to jinx it given our history of matching and unmatching with previous surrogates, but this one feels ‘right.’ Read more to find out how we got to this point, and the lesson for all intended parents of how important it is to try and navigate through their best possible journey.

I had the pleasure of interviewing Shaun Thomas, founder of The Surrogacy Father. Shaun and The Surrogacy Father are completely independent of all clinics, law firms, and agencies, and so he is able to provide an unbiased perspective and support in helping people become parents all over the world. As a gay father of three children through surrogacy in Colombia, Shaun is uniquely qualified for his venture, and in this interview, he shares his approach to intended parents as well as some challenges and successes of The Surrogacy Father.

Our fingers and toes are crossed. We met another amazing potential surrogate. Having two previous matches fall through, we are being extra careful in thinking of all the possible complications of a journey with her. I review the major challenges we could face in this article as we wait for guidance from our legal team on our options and whether we can proceed or not.

The main reason we moved to Sweden was because it could provide my husband and me with a life where we could be parents. The U.S. only allows for parenthood on corporate America’s terms. We wanted a different life for ourselves and our child.

Sperm is important when it comes to rainbow family building, and BabyMoon Family is here to talk about how you can improve your sperm health and fertility as a gay intended dad. Read more to find out how to optimize your sperm prior to IVF and surrogacy on your journey to queer fatherhood.

Following my article giving uncomfortable praise to RFK Jr., I wanted to write about the impact of lower sperm and testosterone levels on gay intended dads. This article looks at the effect sperm health has on fertility and the types of IVF that gay men can consider, with implications on cost and embryo generation.

As our journey to fatherhood progresses amidst some challenging delays, I wanted to take some time to refocus on why we are doing this and write a letter to our future child.

As a physician, Democrat, and bear lover, I don’t support anything RFK Jr. stands for. However, he made headlines last week for talking about the hormonal and reproductive health of American men, and so I had to listen, review, and respond. In this article, I want to review each of these statements, fact check their accuracy, and then discuss what RFK Jr. is actually concerned about when he makes these claims.  

Our second surrogate is now pregnant, but not with our baby. Read more to find out the details as we continue to persevere through this latest and greatest challenge on our IVF and surrogacy journey.

Our surrogate / gestational carrier (GC) has just completed her final medical clearance. In this article, I wanted to review the recommended guidelines for medical screening of GCs in the United States, and compare this to guidelines in Canada and the United Kingdom.

Yajaira and Anthony Zambrano have an incredible story of family building.  The couple demonstrated that intended parents will do whatever it takes to have a child.  They have showcased the hope, challenges, and incredible reward of having children through assisted reproduction. This is the story of their international journey from Texas to Mexico to have their son, Anthony Jr.

Facebook currently plays an integral role in many queer people’s journey to parenthood. There are groups for queer intended dads, matching with surrogates or gestational carriers, and reviews on clinics and agencies. However, Facebook and big social media are increasingly unwelcoming for LGBTQ+ people. Perhaps a niche social media site for queer intended parents and current parents could provide the privacy, safety, information, and community that is so needed.

Bonding with your unborn baby is especially challenging for international intended parents. However, we live in the 21st century and survived a global pandemic. Our lives have never been more remote-friendly, so it’s easier than ever for queer IPs to bond with their surrogate and unborn baby from the other side of the world. Read here about technology and options for you to enjoy and be as present as possible during your pregnancy.

In a new series of interviews for BabyMoon Family, I talk with Scott Blair, a married lawyer in New York City who completed his first journey to fatherhood in Mexico with his husband, David. Scott candidly shares details of his journey, what went well, what he would do differently, and what was challenging. If you are an intended father considering a surrogacy journey in Mexico, this article is for you.

After matching and unmatching with an amazing surrogate / gestational carrier (GC), we have rematched! In this article, I review questions to ask potential matches. I also discuss my own personal experience matching with a GC who has an incredibly supportive husband, and how I think all intended parents (IPs) should view their GCs partner on their journey.

This was a hard article to write as my husband and I have had to unmatch with our gestational carrier (GC). Read more to hear about the challenges with newborn insurance and lessons learned that can and should be applied to any surrogacy journey.